I have really, really vivid and detailed dreams on a regular basis, and am constantly thrilling friends and workmates by reliving every tiny little detail in full Technicolor and surround sound for their entertainment. I’m just generous like that.
But now I have my new best friend, Blog. So when I woke up from a horrible and extremely lifelike dream this morning just bursting to tell someone about it, I thought, Blog will want to hear about this! Blog is probably DYING to hear about this! I should tell Blog straight away!
Because I don’t have swirly music and hazy camera techniques to denote the dream sequence, I will have to rely on the power of ITALICS as a dramatic storytelling device.
I was with one of my brothers, Crazy Brother, and one of my sisters, Narcissistic Sister (or ‘Narcissister’, if you will). Crazy Brother was, strangely, going to see a drug dealer, and even more strangely, thought this would be a fun excursion for his two younger sisters, Narcissister and Geeky Sister (that’s me) to accompany him on.
Crazy, Narcissistic and Geeky approached a very suspect property where a man stood outside holding a machine gun. Crazy and Narcissistic didn’t appear to notice the man holding the machine gun, and continued merrily toward the front steps of the house.
Geeky was, suddenly and completely, unable to move or speak. She could only stand there for what felt like forever, but was probably only a few seconds, and watch as machine gun man lifted his machine gun and pointed it towards Crazy and Narcissistic. Finally Geeky managed to splutter out something unintelligible to alert Crazy and Narcissistic to the danger of being on this very suspect property with this very scary man holding a machine gun. Alas, it was too late. And while Crazy managed to duck to the ground just in time, Narcissistic was mowed down by the scary man with his machine gun.
Geeky rushed to where Narcissistic lay on the footpath and was relieved to find her heart still beating. She waited a long time for the ambulance to arrive, and it finally showed up approximately eight minutes later. The End.
Phew. Well, Blog, I hope you enjoyed my dream and thank you for listening.
